Study Finds That Homosexuality Is Not Actually a Choice, Which is a Huge Disappointment to Homophobes Everywhere

A new study published in the Journal of Sexual Orientation and Gender Diversity has confirmed what most LGBTQ+ people have known all along: homosexuality is not a choice. The study, which involved a comprehensive analysis of over 30 years of research on the topic, found that sexual orientation is determined by a complex interplay of genetic, hormonal, and environmental factors.

The study's findings have been met with disappointment by homophobes everywhere, who have long clung to the idea that homosexuality is a lifestyle choice that can be "cured" through prayer, therapy, or other means.

"I can't believe this study is real," said Jerry Falwell Jr., former president of Liberty University and prominent opponent of LGBTQ+ rights. "I mean, if homosexuality isn't a choice, then what's the point of being homophobic? It's like we've been wasting our time all these years."

Other homophobes expressed similar sentiments. "I always thought homosexuality was a choice," said Karen, a soccer mom from suburban Ohio. "I mean, why else would anyone choose to be gay? Now I don't know what to think."

Despite the disappointment of homophobes, LGBTQ+ advocates have welcomed the study's findings as a step forward in the fight for equality and acceptance. "For too long, homophobes have used the idea that homosexuality is a choice to justify their bigotry and discrimination," said Sarah McBride, a spokesperson for the Human Rights Campaign. "This study debunks that myth once and for all."

The study's lead author, Dr. Emily Nagoski, hopes that the findings will lead to greater understanding and compassion for LGBTQ+ people. "Sexual orientation is a fundamental aspect of who we are as human beings," she said. "It's not something that can be changed or 'cured.' The more we can accept and celebrate diversity in all its forms, the better off we'll all be."