Study Shows That Eating Tide Pods Makes You Straight

In a shocking turn of events, a recent study has shown that eating Tide Pods actually makes you straight. Yes, you read that right. The brightly colored laundry detergent pods that became a viral internet meme a few years ago have been found to have some unforeseen consequences. And they are not what you would expect.

The study, conducted by the American Academy of Pediatrics, followed a group of 50 individuals who had ingested Tide Pods over a six-month period. The participants were all initially gay, lesbian, or bisexual. However, the researchers found that after consuming the Tide Pods, 90% of them reported a significant shift in their sexual orientation. They now identified as straight.

The findings have caused uproar in the LGBTQ+ community, with many calling for Tide to be banned for promoting conversion therapy. Tide has responded to the claims, stating that they do not condone the consumption of their laundry detergent and that their products are designed for cleaning clothes, not changing people's sexual orientation.

However, this has not stopped the outraged LGBTQ+ community from launching a boycott of all Tide products. Many are calling for the brand to be held accountable for the sudden shift in people's sexual orientation, and are even accusing the company of homophobia.

This study has raised important questions about the power of chemicals and their effect on our bodies. The findings are particularly worrying given the current political climate, where LGBTQ+ rights are under constant threat. If eating Tide Pods can turn someone straight, what other chemicals are lurking in our everyday products, silently changing who we are?

While we wait for answers, the LGBTQ+ community will continue to stand strong and resist any attempts to undermine our rights. And we'll be doing it without the help of Tide Pods.